Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.
English Standard Version (ESV)
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Proverbs 23:22
What does Proverbs 23:22 mean?
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Proverbs 23:22
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The verse doesn't just tell us to listen to our father and not despise our mother; it emphasizes why. Your father "begat you," meaning he brought you into existence, and therefore seeks your ultimate good in his counsel. And don't despise your mother, especially "when she is old," because her age and infirmities, rather than diminishing your duty, call for even greater honor and appreciation for her love and experience.
Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old.
English Standard Version (ESV)
This instruction is part of a larger section where Solomon is urging his son to pursue wisdom and understanding, not just as abstract concepts but as practical guides for life. The verses surrounding this remind us that true wisdom involves controlling desires, avoiding gluttony and drunkenness, and valuing truth above all else, all for the joy it brings to parents and for our own ultimate well-being.
Why does Proverbs connect hearing your father with the act of him 'begetting' you? It's more than just biology.
The Foundation of Authority
Proverbs 23:22 starts with a powerful command: "Listen to your father who gave you life." This isn't just a polite suggestion; it's rooted in the very origin of your existence. The phrase "who gave you life" highlights the father's foundational role, not just in bringing you into the world, but in nurturing and providing for you. His counsels and guidance stem from this deep, invested relationship, aiming for your ultimate good. This act of begetting carries with it an inherent claim on your attention and obedience. It’s an acknowledgment that wisdom often flows from those who initiated and invested in your journey.
Beyond Childhood Obedience
This isn't only about a child obeying a parent. As we grow, the dynamic shifts, but the respect and attentiveness should remain. The counsel here is for adults to continue valuing the wisdom and experience of the father who first guided them. It's about recognizing that the source of your life also holds a legacy of experience that can still benefit you.
As parents age, they can become 'helpless' or 'burdensome.' Why does the Bible command us not to despise them?
Counteracting Contempt
The verse adds a crucial command: "do not despise your mother when she is old." Old age often brings physical infirmities and a potential decline in perceived usefulness. This is precisely when contempt can creep in. Young adults, in particular, might dismiss the advice or presence of an aging mother as outdated or irrelevant. The text issues a strong warning against this. It’s a call to look beyond the physical limitations and recognize the enduring value of the person and her love.
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The Duty of Gratitude
This command is strengthened by the reality of what mothers endure. The pains and care involved in birth and upbringing create indelible obligations. Despising an aging mother is to disregard her past sacrifices and the deep emotional bonds forged over a lifetime. Instead of contempt, the text calls for gratitude and continued respect, cherishing the love and experience she still offers, even in her later years. Her value doesn't diminish with age; our duty to honor her deepens.
Understand the original words
buz · Hebrew Verb
To treat with contempt, disregard, or consider of no value. It is the opposite of the honor and reverence commanded toward parents.
This verse grounds the command to honor parents in the Ten Commandments, showing it's a foundational moral law from God, not just good advice.
Ephesians 6:1-3Paul directly quotes and expands on the command to honor parents from the Old Testament, linking it to blessings and reinforcing its importance for believers.
Leviticus 19:32This passage emphasizes showing reverence for the elderly, specifically highlighting the need to stand up for and not despise older people, mirroring the instruction about a mother in her old age.
Luke 2:51This shows Jesus himself, even as a young boy growing in wisdom, submitting to his parents, providing a perfect example of obedience and respect.
jfbProverbs 23:22: "Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old."
- Hearken—that is, obey (Pr 1:8; Eph 6:1).despise … old—Adults revere the parents whom, as children, they once obeyed.
clarkeProverbs 23:22: "Hearken unto thy father that begat thee, and despise not thy mother when she is old."
Despise not thy mother when she is old - A very necessary caution, as very old women are generally helpless, useless, and burdensome: yet these circumstances do not at all lessen the child's duty. And this duty is strengthened by the Divine command here given.
The verse doesn't just tell us to listen to our father and not despise our mother; it emphasizes why. Your father "begat you," meaning he brought you into existence, and therefore seeks your ultimate good in his counsel. And don't despise your mother, especially "when she is old," because her age and infirmities, rather than diminishing your duty, call for even greater honor and appreciation for her love and experience.
This instruction is part of a larger section where Solomon is urging his son to pursue wisdom and understanding, not just as abstract concepts but as practical guides for life. The verses surrounding this remind us that true wisdom involves controlling desires, avoiding gluttony and drunkenness, and valuing truth above all else, all for the joy it brings to parents and for our own ultimate well-being.
This instruction is part of a larger section where Solomon is urging his son to pursue wisdom and understanding, not just as abstract concepts but as practical guides for life. The verses surrounding this remind us that true wisdom involves controlling desires, avoiding gluttony and drunkenness, and valuing truth above all else, all for the joy it brings to parents and for our own ultimate well-being.
"Listen to your father who gave you life, and do not despise your mother when she is old." — The verse doesn't just tell us to listen to our father and not despise our mother; it emphasizes why. Your father "begat you," meaning he brought you into existence, and therefore seeks your ultima…
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Last reviewed October 2026