Proverbs 19:6-7
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This verse reveals that true friendship is rare, because people are often drawn to those who can give them something, not to those who genuinely care. The "friend" of the generous person is often just a show of affection, seeking personal gain rather than authentic connection.
Many seek the favor of a generous man, and everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts. All a poor man’s brothers hate him; how much more do his friends go far from him! He pursues them with words, but does not have them.
English Standard Version (ESV)
This proverb reflects on the superficial nature of human relationships, especially when wealth is involved. It highlights how people flock to those who are generous or powerful, seeking personal gain, while true friendship is scarce and often unrewarded. This sets the stage for later verses that contrast this opportunistic behavior with genuine wisdom and righteousness.
We all want friends, but what kind of friendships are we building? This verse shines a light on the surprising truth behind superficial connections.
Proverbs 19:6 points out that many people flock to those who have something to give. The Hebrew word for 'generous' or 'prince' here can also mean someone with a 'princely disposition' or simply a 'liberal man.'
A Fair-Weather Phenomenon
Think about it: who gets invited to the most parties? Often, it's the person who's always buying rounds, footing the bill, or offering favors. People are drawn to the benefits of generosity, not necessarily the heart behind it. This isn't genuine friendship; it's conditional association based on what can be gained.
The Appearance of Friendship
As some commentators note, this 'friendship' is often 'in show, or profession.' It’s a friendship of convenience, not of commitment. When the giving stops, so does the crowd. This highlights a deep human tendency to seek out those who can benefit us, rather than cultivating relationships based on mutual respect and genuine care.
Is there a way to experience deeper, more lasting friendships than the kind described in this verse?
While Proverbs 19:6 describes the allure of superficial generosity, it implicitly contrasts this with a more profound kind of giving. The 'generous man' who attracts crowds is often seen as a 'prince' or a 'liberal man.' This suggests someone with a noble spirit, not just a full wallet.
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Beyond Material Gifts
Genuine generosity isn't just about handing out money or gifts. It's about a generous spirit – offering your time, your attention, your support, and your genuine care. This kind of giving, rooted in love and integrity, fosters bonds that are far more resilient than those based on transactional favor-seeking.
The Heart of the Matter
The 'friend' who is attracted only by gifts is not a true friend. The verse, when read in the context of Proverbs, encourages us to look beyond outward appearances and to cultivate and value relationships built on character, loyalty, and selfless love. True friendship isn't bought; it's built.
Understand the original words
panim · Hebrew Noun
In a biblical context, this refers to the acceptance, kindness, or goodwill shown by one person toward another, often implying an advantageous position gained through relationship or generosity. It is frequently used to describe the gracious attitude of God toward His people.
nadib · Hebrew Adjective
A Hebrew term describing a generous, noble, or open-handed person. It implies a spirit of bounty and willingness to share resources with others.
rash · Hebrew Adjective/Noun
One who is destitute, needy, or lacking in worldly goods. The Bible frequently emphasizes God’s special concern for the poor and the moral obligation of others to care for them.
sane · Hebrew Verb
A term for profound dislike, hostility, or alienation. In a theological sense, it is the opposite of covenantal love (hesed) and often involves a deliberate turning away or rejection of another.
Jesus talks about hosting banquets not just for those who can repay, highlighting how true generosity isn't about seeking favor or repayment, but about selfless giving.
Matthew 6:3-4This passage contrasts worldly motives for giving with genuine righteousness, showing that true generosity is done in secret, not for the praise or friendship of others.
Proverbs 18:24This verse presents a stark contrast to the superficial friendships mentioned in Proverbs 19:6, emphasizing that a true friend sticks closer than family, a loyalty not bought with gifts.
Ecclesiastes 11:1-2While this passage encourages generous giving and scattering of wealth, it does so with a future hope and trust in God's sovereignty, not for the immediate accrual of human favor.
barnesProverbs 19:6: "Many will intreat the favour of the prince: and every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts."
Intreat the favor ... - literally, "stroke the face" of the man of princely nature, who gives munificently.
bensonProverbs 19:6: "Many will intreat the favour of the prince: and every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts."
Proverbs 19:6-7. Many will entreat the favour of the prince — Or, of the liberal, or bountiful man, as נדיב may be properly rendered. Kings and princes were anciently called benefactors, Luke 22:25 . And every man is a friend to him that giveth gifts — Not sincerely, however, as daily experience shows, but only in show, or profession, or in the outward expressions of friendship and k…
This verse reveals that true friendship is rare, because people are often drawn to those who can give them something, not to those who genuinely care. The "friend" of the generous person is often just a show of affection, seeking personal gain rather than authentic connection.
This proverb reflects on the superficial nature of human relationships, especially when wealth is involved. It highlights how people flock to those who are generous or powerful, seeking personal gain, while true friendship is scarce and often unrewarded. This sets the stage for later verses that contrast this opportunistic behavior with genuine wisdom and righteousness.
This proverb reflects on the superficial nature of human relationships, especially when wealth is involved. It highlights how people flock to those who are generous or powerful, seeking personal gain, while true friendship is scarce and often unrewarded. This sets the stage for later verses that contrast this opportunistic behavior with genuine wisdom and righteousness.
"Many seek the favor of a generous man, and everyone is a friend to a man who gives gifts. All a poor man’s brothers hate him; how much more do his friends go far from him! He pursues them with words, but does not have t…" — This verse reveals that true friendship is rare, because people are often drawn to those who can give them something, not to those who genuinely care. The "friend" of the generous person is often jus…
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Last reviewed October 2026
