Matthew 18:15-17
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The ultimate aim here isn't just to get an apology, but to gain your brother back—to restore him to fellowship and wholeness. This means the approach isn't about winning an argument or proving you're right, but about reconciliation, like a physician treating a patient to bring them back to health.
“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be established by the evidence of two or three witnesses. If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church. And if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
English Standard Version (ESV)
Jesus is instructing his disciples on how to handle disputes and sin within the community. Following a discussion about humility and avoiding causing others to stumble, he lays out a specific, multi-step process for addressing a brother who has sinned, beginning with direct, private confrontation to restore the relationship. This teaching is presented as a way to preserve unity and love within the fellowship, rather than letting offenses fester or become public spectacles.
When a brother sins against you, Jesus doesn't say 'wait' or 'complain.' He gives a clear, immediate instruction. What’s the power behind this direct command?
Jesus’ first instruction for dealing with a sin committed against you is simple: 'Go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone.' This isn't about passively hoping things get better; it’s an active, personal mission.
Taking the Initiative
The Greek word for 'go' (hypage) is an imperative, a command. It means you initiate the conversation. Don't wait for the other person to come to you or for the offense to blow over. This is especially important because it's the harder, more humble path. It means swallowing your pride for the sake of restoring fellowship.
The Power of Privacy
'Between you and him alone' is crucial. This isn't about gathering evidence or public shaming. It's about creating a safe space for honest conversation. The goal isn't to win an argument, but to win your brother back. When done privately, the person who has sinned has a chance to listen, reflect, and respond without the pressure or embarrassment of an audience. This privacy protects both individuals and the reputation of the church.
The Goal: To Gain, Not to Shame
Jesus says, 'If he listens to you, you have gained your brother.' The word 'gained' here is powerful. It implies that the brother was, in a sense, lost through his sin. Your effort isn't about punishment but about restoration. You've recovered something precious that was slipping away. It’s a profound spiritual victory, reclaiming a fellow believer for God and for fellowship.
Ask a follow-up
Jesus’ approach to conflict isn't about letting things slide; it's about healing. But how can a direct confrontation be a form of healing?
Jesus provides a clear process for addressing sin within the community, and the first step is a personal, private confrontation. The word translated as 'tell him his fault' or 'reprove him' (elenxon) is not about harsh accusation, but about careful examination and conviction.
More Than Just 'Telling'
This verb implies testing, examining, and demonstrating. It's about gently but firmly showing the person how their actions have caused harm or fallen short of God's standard. It’s about helping them see the reality of their sin, not to shame them, but to lead them to repentance. Think of it like a doctor diagnosing an illness—the diagnosis itself is painful, but it’s necessary for the healing process.
The Goal: Spiritual Health
When we 'gain our brother,' it means we've helped restore him to a right relationship with God and with us. Sin can alienate us from God and from our community. This process is designed to bring that person back. It’s a vital part of the church’s responsibility to care for the spiritual health of its members. By addressing sin directly and lovingly, we prevent it from festering and causing greater damage to the individual and the body of Christ.
Why It Matters So Much
Jesus’ emphasis on this process underscores the high value God places on reconciliation and unity within his people. To neglect this ‘going and telling’ is not just to allow a personal grievance to linger; it’s to potentially allow a soul to remain in a state of sin, separated from the life and fellowship God intends.
Understand the original words
adelphos · Greek Noun
Refers to a fellow member of the covenant community or a fellow believer in Christ, emphasizing the bonds of spiritual kinship and obligation.
hamartanō · Greek Verb
To miss the mark of God's standard of holiness; it involves transgression against God’s law or a failure to love one’s neighbor as oneself.
elenchos · Greek Noun
A shortcoming, mistake, or offense that carries the responsibility of correction or restoration within the context of Christian community.
rhēma · Greek Noun
A legal or moral accusation brought against someone, often requiring validation to determine truth and ensure justice.
martys · Greek Noun
Individuals who provide testimony, truth-telling, or verification of an event, grounded in Old Testament legal requirements for establishing facts.
ekklēsia · Greek Noun
The called-out assembly of believers; the body of Christ or a local congregation of disciples.
ethnikos · Greek Adjective/Noun
Historically, a non-Jewish person; often used in Scripture to denote outsiders to the covenantal community of Israel.
telōnēs · Greek Noun
In the ancient Jewish context, these individuals were often viewed as collaborators with Rome and considered traitors or social outcasts.
This passage from the Old Testament law directly informs Jesus' instruction, emphasizing the importance of speaking to a fellow Israelite who has wronged you rather than harboring resentment.
Proverbs 15:1This proverb highlights the power of a gentle response to de-escalate conflict, echoing Jesus' command to address the offense privately and kindly.
Galatians 6:1Paul, inspired by the same spirit, instructs believers to restore those caught in sin with gentleness, reinforcing the principle of private, restorative correction taught by Jesus.
1 Corinthians 6:1-7This passage details the Apostle Paul's frustration with believers taking each other to secular courts, implicitly endorsing Jesus' teaching that disputes should be resolved within the community first.
vincentMatthew 18:15: "Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother."
Go (ὕπαγε)Do not wait for him to come to you.Tell him his fault (ἔλεγξον)Rev., shew him. The verb means, first, to test, try, search out; therefore, to cross-examine with a view of convincing or refuting; thence to rebuke or chide. The Rev. shew is better than tell, which implies merely naming the fault; whereas the…
calvinMatthew 18:15-20: "Moreover if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother."
- But if thy brother hath sinned against thee, go and reprove him between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. 16. But if he shall not hear thee, take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be confirmed: and if he shall not hear them,…
The ultimate aim here isn't just to get an apology, but to gain your brother back—to restore him to fellowship and wholeness. This means the approach isn't about winning an argument or proving you're right, but about reconciliation, like a physician treating a patient to bring them back to health.
Jesus is instructing his disciples on how to handle disputes and sin within the community. Following a discussion about humility and avoiding causing others to stumble, he lays out a specific, multi-step process for addressing a brother who has sinned, beginning with direct, private confrontation to restore the relationship. This teaching is presented as a way to preserve unity and love within the fellowship, rather than letting offenses fester or become public spectacles.
Jesus is instructing his disciples on how to handle disputes and sin within the community. Following a discussion about humility and avoiding causing others to stumble, he lays out a specific, multi-step process for addressing a brother who has sinned, beginning with direct, private confrontation to restore the relationship. This teaching is presented as a way to preserve unity and love within the fellowship, rather than letting offenses fester or become public spectacles.
"“If your brother sins against you, go and tell him his fault, between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have gained your brother. But if he does not listen, take one or two others along with you, that every charge may be establi…" — The ultimate aim here isn't just to get an apology, but to gain your brother back—to restore him to fellowship and wholeness. This means the approach isn't about winning an argument or proving you'…
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Last reviewed October 2026
