And the spirit of the king longed to go out to Absalom, because he was comforted about Amnon, since he was dead.
English Standard Version (ESV)
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2 Samuel 13:39
What does 2 Samuel 13:39 mean?
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2 Samuel 13:39
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What's easy to miss here is David's intense grief for Amnon is soothed by the news of Absalom's defiance, not by Amnon's death itself. This reveals how David's heart was already fractured, wrestling with competing, painful loyalties that warred within him.
And the spirit of the king longed to go out to Absalom, because he was comforted about Amnon, since he was dead.
English Standard Version (ESV)
After Absalom’s violent act of revenge against Amnon for raping his sister Tamar, King David is overcome with grief for his dead son Amnon but also deeply longs for his fugitive son Absalom, despite the terrible deed. This verse marks the turning point where David’s mourning shifts from outrage and pursuit to a desire for reconciliation with Absalom, setting the stage for his eventual, albeit complicated, return to Jerusalem.
David's deepest desire is to see his rebellious son again. But what does this longing reveal about his grief, and how does it contrast with God's view?
A Father's Raw Emotion
David's spirit "longed to go out to Absalom." This is the raw, unvarnished cry of a father's heart. Absalom had committed a terrible act – murdering his half-brother Amnon, who had raped his sister Tamar. Yet, the news of Amnon's death brought a strange comfort to David, allowing his longing for Absalom, who had fled, to surface. It's the natural, human desire to reconcile with a child, even one who has caused immense pain.
The Divine Contrast
While David's longing is understandable, it highlights a crucial difference between human affection and God's perfect justice and love. David is comforted because the problem (Amnon's sin and subsequent threat) is gone. His focus is on his relationship with his son, Absalom. God, however, grieves over sin itself and desires the repentance of the sinner, not just the removal of consequences. David's comfort is earthly and limited, whereas God's concern is eternal and all-encompassing.
David's grief over Amnon's death is complicated. What does it mean to be "comforted" when a son is dead, and how does this verse hint at God's unseen hand?
The Paradox of Comfort
It seems strange for a father to be "comforted" by the death of one son. But here, Amnon's death removes a great source of anguish for David. Amnon was the heir, and his violent death would have brought immense political and personal turmoil. Absalom's act, though heinous, ultimately resolves . David's comfort isn't in Amnon's demise itself, but in the removal of a deeply troubling situation that threatened the kingdom and his family.
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God's Subtle Work
While not explicitly stated, David's ability to even feel comforted suggests a measure of divine sovereignty at work. The chaos was immense, yet David's spirit is able to find a (complex) sense of peace that allows his longing for Absalom to surface. It hints that even in the darkest family dramas, God is working, and His purposes, though often hidden, are being accomplished. David's human longing for his son is allowed to breathe amidst the tragedy, perhaps setting the stage for future interactions, however flawed.
Understand the original words
ruach · Hebrew Noun
Refers to the immaterial part of a human being—the inner life, intellect, will, or seat of emotions. It denotes the essence of a person's temperament, desire, or disposition, often indicating where the person's true inclinations lie.
kalah · Hebrew Verb
To desire, crave, or pine for something or someone that is absent. It expresses a deep, intense yearning or emotional inclination towards an object of affection, often implying a restless search for satisfaction or reconciliation.
nacham · Hebrew Verb
To be consoled, encouraged, or to find peace after suffering distress or loss. Theologically, it implies the easing of mental or emotional suffering, often through the passage of time, divine intervention, or the acceptance of a new reality.
This passage reveals the deep, complex grief of a father. David's longing for his son Absalom, who murdered his other son Amnon, highlights the crushing weight of sin and its consequences on even the most beloved families.
c. 1000 BC
David's Reign as King
David, a beloved king, united the tribes of Israel and established Jerusalem as his capital.
Unknown date, before 2 Samuel 13
Amnon rapes Tamar
David's eldest son, Amnon, rapes his half-sister Tamar, bringing shame and discord to the royal family.
Unknown date, after the rape
Absalom avenges Tamar
Absalom, Tamar's full brother, plots and executes Amnon, fleeing into exile afterward.
c. 2 years after Amnon's death
Absalom's return to Jerusalem
Through the clever intervention of Joab, David allows Absalom to return to Jerusalem, though not yet to his father's presence.
Unknown date, after Absalom's return— this verse
David longs for Absalom
David's heart is still set on Absalom, even after the murder of Amnon and his own exile. This longing is profound, showing David's fatherly affection despite Absalom's actions.
This passage shows how Joab uses a wise woman to craft a story that appeals to David's heart, mirroring how David's own longing for Absalom might be swayed by clever pleas.
Proverbs 17:25This verse speaks to the deep pain and sorrow a foolish son can bring to his father, highlighting the emotional turmoil David must have been experiencing with his sons' actions.
2 Samuel 18:33David's inconsolable grief over Absalom's death, even in victory, demonstrates the profound and often destructive nature of a parent's love and sorrow, a feeling David likely held for Amnon too.
Genesis 37:35This verse describes Jacob's refusal to be comforted after Joseph's supposed death, showing a precedent for a father's deep, unwavering sorrow that resonates with David's reaction to his son's death.
What's easy to miss here is David's intense grief for Amnon is soothed by the news of Absalom's defiance, not by Amnon's death itself. This reveals how David's heart was already fractured, wrestling with competing, painful loyalties that warred within him.
After Absalom’s violent act of revenge against Amnon for raping his sister Tamar, King David is overcome with grief for his dead son Amnon but also deeply longs for his fugitive son Absalom, despite the terrible deed. This verse marks the turning point where David’s mourning shifts from outrage and pursuit to a desire for reconciliation with Absalom, setting the stage for his eventual, albeit complicated, return to Jerusalem.
After Absalom’s violent act of revenge against Amnon for raping his sister Tamar, King David is overcome with grief for his dead son Amnon but also deeply longs for his fugitive son Absalom, despite the terrible deed. This verse marks the turning point where David’s mourning shifts from outrage and pursuit to a desire for reconciliation with Absalom, setting the stage for his eventual, albeit complicated, return to Jerusalem.
"And the spirit of the king longed to go out to Absalom, because he was comforted about Amnon, since he was dead." — What's easy to miss here is David's intense grief for Amnon is soothed by the news of Absalom's defiance, not by Amnon's death itself. This reveals how David's heart was already fractured, wrestlin…
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Last reviewed October 2026